Imagine you and your partner are hanging around the house on the weekend. You’re busy working on your computer, and your partner comments on how they would love to go to the park with you. You ignore your partner, immersed in your work. You’ve just turned against your partner’s bid for connection.
A relationship killer is turning against each other’s bids for emotional connection.
“Turning against” happens when your partner reaches out to you and you reject them. Whether intentional or not, it damages the very fabric of your partnership. And it doesn’t just happen when you ignore your partner. Hurtful comments, provocative comebacks, and criticism are other possibilities.
The build-up of such responses creates a deep divide between you two. The more of these you and your partner experience, the more likely they are to destroy your partnership entirely.
Related Blog Posts:
- What “Turning Against” Really Means
- 3 Ways to Make a Better Bid for Connection
- A Deeper Look Into Turning Away From Your Partner
The Relationship Minute is from The Gottman Institute. Visit their website.