Relationship Minute: Fire needs friction

Conflict is uncomfortable and many avoid it at all costs. Yet however it manifests, conflict in relationships is inevitable. All couples have problems, disagreements, and friction—that’s the result of putting two different people together. It’s how couples manage their conflict that makes the difference.

Every disagreement has the power to transform the relationship. If you can view it as a shared experience that you made it through together, and emerged from stronger, you can use conflict as an opportunity to grow.

Flint needs friction to start a fire. Sharing your opposing viewpoints and being vulnerable enough to say, “this matters to me,” is an act of intimacy.

Emerge from conflicts closer to each other—forged in fire.

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The Relationship Minute is from The Gottman Institute. You can sign up here to get it delivered to your inbox every Tuesday and Thursday morning.